Ever heard of The Sandwich Generation? We will all go through it eventually unless we are extremely unlucky. This is the situation where you are raising your own family and also have elderly parents who need a great deal of help to manage their finances, their home, and, in some cases, even their health. We are pulled in both directions, and it can become quite busy and stressful; however, would you want it any other way? For example, you might not have kids and miss out entirely on that side of life. Your parents could already be gone, and you will miss them. Regardless of the stage that you are at, take the time to enjoy both your own family and your parents. By including them, you will get to enjoy many different aspects of family life that you would otherwise miss.
There are some things that can be done to help make life easier for both parties. It is really up to you regarding how you manage your life and that of your family. Make the most of it while you can.
The Sandwich Generation – Finances
At some point, you may have to be approved as a proxy for your parents so that you can pay their bills and manage their day-to-day expenses. You may have to see the bank where all of the accounts are held and have your parents give you the authority to do this. Many people are nervous about taking this approach since money is involved; however, at some point, there is no choice. A living will is another good thing to consider. A living will spell out how health issues are to be dealt with and how money and bill payments are to be handled. It is all very legal and should be set up using a lawyer.
The Sandwich Generation – Health
As our health begins to fail, we can do less and less physically. Most people want to be independent; however, if someone is willing to help, take advantage of the assistance so that you can focus on the things that can be looked after by yourself. If you are a child or caregiver, remember that the senior person most likely has a lot of pride and does not want to admit that they can no longer look after themselves. Be positive about things and make suggestions about what you can do to help; let the person consider it, and pitch in whenever you can.
The Sandwich Generation – List of Helpful Activities
- Day-to-day managing finances
- Daily chores
- Home maintenance
- Outdoor lawn care and maintenance
- Paying bills
- Buying groceries
- Cooking meals
- Daily hygiene
1) Yes2) No3) Gross household inocme last year was nearly $300k. Total expenses < $60k. We buy pretty much whatever we really want, which does not all include all the typical American consumerist crap. If I lived in a cheap area and didn't have to work so much we could easily cut our expenses down to $50k, including health insurance for the whole family.4) West or Northwest US, but also considering cheaper places outside the US5) Late 30's, expect to be "semi-retired" by 45. That means I'll still do some work but only stuff I find interesting and fun, not worrying about the pay. Like maybe half time consulting or teaching some college classes.